Piccolo: The Pop Star Days
by Trixie-chan
Summary: * ANOTHER Little Note is up!* Hooray! My first non-romance story! This story contains swearing, Brittany Spears/Piccolo cat fights, and EXTREME OOCness on Piccolo\'s part. But it\'s funny! ^^
1. Chapter One: Piccolo... A Pop Star?!

Piccolo - The Pop Star Days Disclaimer: I do not own DBZ, but I do own pop star Piccolo and his songs (I just own the idea of pop star Piccolo and I came up with the songs).   
Sounds like a scary story, eh? I know! Isn't it genius?? Get Piccolo to loosen up a bit....   


**Piccolo: The Pop Star Days**   
**_Piccolo becomes... A pop singer?!_**   
::Author runs off screaming::   


"Oops I did it again!" ::click:: "I'm a genie in a bottle, baby." ::click:: "Backstreet's back, all right!" ::click:: "Bye bye bye!" ::click::   
"Damnit!" Piccolo yelled turning the TV off. "I am sick of this shit! Too many of these whiney brats! Get them singing lessons at least..."   
He got up, walked outside, then sat down in the grass cross-legged and thought. "How do I get these crappy little turds off of the airwaves?" Piccolo   
thought for a second, then thrust his finger in the air (AN - For all of my fellow pervs, for once, that was not meant to be sex-related), and yelled, "Aha! I   
can show them what being a pop singer is all about! I will show them how to really sing! It has been my lifelong dream to be a famous singer..." stars   
appear in his eyes as he clasps his hands together, "I will shine like a morning star...!"   
Piccolo hopped up and down and clapped giddily, then skipped off into the house. 

He stuffed the last of his things into his duffle bag and swung it over his shoulder. He slammed open the door with a big smile on his face, then   
triumphantly put his fists on his hips. "I'm gonna be a pop star!" he cried, then shot off into the sky like Superman. 

Piccolo arrived at the music studio and walked inside to the secretary's desk. The secretary just sat there sleeping with her cheek in her palm, drooling   
slightly out of the corner of her mouth. Piccolo stood there patiently, just looking at her awkwardly. Finally, after getting very impatient, he leaned in slightly   
and said, "Excuse me..." The secretary jumped awake, startled.   
"Oh... uhh... um.. hello!" she stuttered, nervously fixing her hair and adjusting herself in her chair. "What can I help you with?"   
"I'm here to try out for being a pop singer!" Piccolo said with enthusiasm and pride.   
"Oh, well that's nice..." the secretary said with a weird look on her face that said, *That wants to be a pop singer...? .......... Riiiiiiiight..........* "Do you   
have an appointment?"   
"Yep! It should be under 'Piccolo, boy genius'," Piccolo replied, still with the large look of pride. The secretary raised an eyebrow at this, but then began   
to type away on her computer. She stared at the screen for a second, then turned back to Piccolo. "Well.... I'll be damned.... here it is.... Just wait out there,   
in one of those chairs while I call up and tell the talent agent that his 5:30 has arrived."   
"Will do!" Piccolo said happily, then skipped over to a chair and sat down, hands on his knees, great posture, and a big smile with his eyes wide open.   
The receptionist looked at him awkwardly. *Now that right there... that's messed up...* she thought, then picked up the phone and dialed 47 for the   
talent agent's office.   
Piccolo stayed frozen in his position, happily awaiting the assistant to tell him he could go up. When he finally heard her say, "You may go up now," he   
flipped out, screaming "yippee" and jumping all around the room.   
She looked at him with a blank stare, then she put her forehead in her hand and sighed in frustration. "Do you want to know how to get there?" she   
asked.   
Piccolo shot over to her. "Uh huh! Uh huh! Uh huh!"   
"You go down that hall, take a right, then get into the elevator. Go to the 5th floor, then it's the door at the end of the hall. It should say 'Richard Grace'   
on it, he's the talent agent."   
"Thank you!" Piccolo squealed and took off down the hall. The receptionist looked down after him till he was out of site. Then she reached under her desk   
and grabbed a flask. She looked at it, threw it behind her and reached under her desk again. This time she pulled out a huge bottle of whiskey and downed   
it in a second.   
"I need a new job..." 

Piccolo burst into the room, throwing his arms wide open. "It's me! Your sexy green bitch! I'm here!" Piccolo called, getting startled gasps as responses. One of them, behind a big desk, regained himself first, straightened his glasses, and said, "I take it you are Piccolo Boy Genius?"   
"That's me!" he shouted, dropping his bag on the floor and walked over to his desk, sitting down in a chair.   
"Okay..." he replied uneasily. "I see you want to try out so you can become... a... singer...."   
"Thaaaat's right! I am gonna be famous! People will love me and adore me!" The talent agent just stared at him awkwardly.   
"Uhhh... okay.... Do you need to change or anything for the tryouts?"   
"Oh yes!" Piccolo cried. "Be right back! I'll go change in the Little Namek's Room!" Then he picked up his duffel bag and ran out of the room towards the bathroom. The people in the room looked at each other, scared and confused. 

After a couple minutes, piccolo burst into the room again wearing a curly blonde wig and blue overalls. He sauntered in and started to sing. 

"Animal crackers in my soup   
monkeys and rabbits loop the loop,   
Gosh, oh gee, but I have fun,   
swallowin' animals one by one.   
In every bowl of soup I see,   
lions and tigers watching me,   
I made 'em jump right thru a hoop,   
those animal crackers in my soup 

When they're inside me   
where its dark,   
I walk around like Noah's ark   
I stuff my tummy like a goop   
with animal crackers in my soup!" 

The entire room was speechless. Piccolo's eyes bulged as he grinned wildly. "Well??" he cried.   
The talent agent cleared his throat. "We don't think you're uhh.... 'right' for this company..."   
Piccolo's eyes transformed to puppy dog eyes as they welled up with tears. His bottom lip quivered, and sniffling, he turned around and plopped down cross-legged on the floor. After a bit of sniffling and whimpering, he screamed out, "It's not fair!!!" then burst into tears, crying loudly.   
The people in the room looked at each other, once again scared and confused. Then they all turned their attention to the talent agent. He looked around wildly, wondering what to do. "Umm.... Mr. Piccolo....?"   
"::sniff:: Uh huh....." Piccolo whined.   
"... We have um.... changed our decision... We will allow you to become a singer, but we will stop if we do not get profits."   
Piccolo jumped up and turned around, the giddy, gleeful look back on his face. "Yes! My chance has come! On my way up! I'm a pop singer!!"   


The end of chapter one. Will Piccolo get the company a profit? Will he become a pop star?? I think we're all a little frightened here.... Tune in next time for.... Piccolo: The Pop Star Days - Piccolo, On The Way Up!   
  
  



	2. Chapter Two: On The Way Up

Piccolo - The Pop Star Days Ch 2 - On The Way Up Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ, if you sued me, you'd get about 3 cents.... ::sniffle:: that's all i have...   
Story Title: **Piccolo: The Pop Star Days**   
Chapter Title: On The Way Up   
Genre: Humor   
Rating: PG-13 (I have the "f" woid in here... ^^)   
Notes: Well, here's chapter two! I know it took me a while, but after chapter one, I just kinda blanked out.... ^^; Anyway, I don't know how this chapter's gonna turn out. It's as much a surprise to you as it is to me. ^^ Anyway, enjoy!   
"..." = speaking   
*...* = thinking   
  


When Piccolo got home, he spent hours just running in circles in his living room giggling like a little school girl and clapping his hands. But eventually he had to stop, he was getting so dizzy he was falling over. Finally, he sat down to think.   
"Now I need to come up with a song..." he thought aloud. "I wanna sing a song that kinda tells about me and what's going on in my life.... God I would love to sing 'It's Not Easy Being Green'! But that's not my own personal song, I didn't write it..." Then Piccolo went quiet and just sat there on his couch in The Thinker pose. 

The Next Morning... 

Piccolo, stuck in the same position, was still thinking about what song to write. Suddenly, his eyes widened and his pointer finger shot up in the air. "I've an idea!" he cried. He jumped up and ran to the kitchen. He opened up a drawer next to his refrigerator, pulled out a pencil and notebook he had in there, then turned to the fridge. He opened that up and looked for what to get out. *Decisions decisions...* Piccolo thought as he looked at the shelves upon shelves of bottled water ('member, he doesn't eat, he just drinks water... ^^). *Normal water, or flavored water.... Aquafina, or Kwenchers..... Aquafina or Kwenchers...* Then the thought hit him. "Wait a minute... why the hell should I have to choose?" he said as he grabbed an Aquafina and a Kiwi-Strawberry Kwenchers, then he headed out to the living room.   
He sat down on the couch and opened the Kwenchers bottle. He drank a little bit, then his eyes flew open and he spat it back out, disgust written all over his face. "This is shit!!! What the hell is this?? They expect people to like it??!" he cried, the he chucked the still full bottle aimlessly.... and watched as his window shattered. He just kinda looked at it for a while. "Someone's gonna pay for that..." he finally said, bringing his attention back to the issue at hand.   
He picked up his pencil and began writing furiously in his notebook. He had finally got an idea for a song. 

Not too long later, he lifted the notebook straight out in front of him with both hands on either side of it, then brought it too himself. He hugged it, kissed it, then held it out in front of him again. "You," he said, "are my masterpiece." Then got up and ran over to the phone, picked it up, and called his agency.   
"Hello, Grace Talent Agency, Allison speaking," the voice on the other line said.   
"Hello, I would like to speak to Mr. Richard Grace please!" Piccolo said ecstatically.   
"Who may I ask is calling?"   
"This is Piccolo. Tell him it's important."   
There was silence on the other line for a minute. ".... Piccolo....?" the voice asked timidly, almost frightened.   
"Uhhh... that's right."   
There was another long pause, then he heard the sound of liquid moving in a glass bottle, some swallowing, and a sigh. "Hold on.... Transferring...." Piccolo was quite confused. Some nice elevator (or elvalator as I say it) music was put on, instantly making Piccolo even more happy. He started dancing around the kitchen and singing to the old tunes. He wasn't even paying attention to the sudden "Hello! Hello?"s on the other line.   
"Who is this!!" someone screamed on the other line, breaking Piccolo out of his dancing and singing phase.   
"Oh, I'm sorry Mr. Grace, got caught up in the moment. This is Piccolo sir," he said apologetically.   
"Oh yes, Mr. Piccolo..." Mr. Grace said. "What can I do for you?"   
"Well, I wrote a song! And I would like to sing it to you to see if you like it sometime."   
"Well that's.... great! Umm... Our earliest convenience would be in two days, Thursday. Is that okay with you? That gives you 3 days to practice the performance for us."   
"That's perfectly fine with me! What time?"   
"How is 3:00 pm for you?"   
"Great! I'll see you then Mr. Grace! And may the piece be with you."   
"Yea...... sure..... sayonara Mr. Piccolo."   
"Ja ne!" Piccolo cried happily through the phone then hung up the phone. He danced his way over to his living room to start right away on what he was going to do. 

During the 3 days that Piccolo had to work on his performance, he memorized his song, worked many hours oh his dancing for it, and recorded the music for it, playing it on his grand piano. That's right, Piccolo has a grand piano. He could hardly contain himself when Thursday had arrived. 

He was giggling and jumping around the waiting room as the secretary was mercilessly sucking down gin. When the phone finally rang down their Piccolo instantly stopped exactly where he was, which was in mid air with his hands almost touching in a clap.   
"Yes... Alright.... Right. Thank you so much sir... so much...." The secretary put the phone down and turned to Piccolo, taking another gulp of her gin. "Mr. Grace tells you to come up, he is ready to see your performance."   
Piccolo rushed over to the chair he set his stuff on and picked up his tape player and his papers, then ran over to the elevator. When he got out at the top he ran over to Mr. Grace's door and burst in screaming, "It's me! Your sexy green bitch!"   
"Do you say that every time you enter a room?" Mr. Grace asked with an eyebrow raised. Piccolo looked stunned.   
"Yes actually.... How'd you know?" Piccolo asked, dumbfounded. Mr. Grace just put his forehead in his right hand and sighed.   
"Are you ready to sing me your song?" he asked, almost frightened.   
"Oh that's right!" he cried. He ran and set his tape player on a near by chair, then went around and handed out the papers to everyone there, they were the lyrics so they could go along with the song. Then he ran back over to the chair, turned around and addressed the people. "I have written a song entitled 'On The Way Up'. It is a song that tells a little bit about myself, the new and rising star!" Then he turned around to the chair, pressed play, then stood with his back to everyone in a big open area. (You guys are gonna have to invision the music for yourselves.... ^^;)   
The music started to play... slowly at first...   


_"I am your everyday world savior_   
_But I have always had dreams_   
_And on the outside, I'm green and look scary_   
_But things aren't always what they seem..."_

The music picks up and moves faster and more upbeat. 

_"Yesterday I was nobody_   
_Nobody knew my name_   
_Now I'm on the way up_   
_I am rising closer to fame!___

_Mabye soon, I will be well known_   
_It's always been my dream_   
_So sit back and relax to my songs_   
_I would like some pickles and cream!___

_I. Am. On the way up!_   
_Soon I'll be on the top!_   
_I. Am. On the way up!_   
_And I will not be able to stop!_   
_I'm on the way uuuuup!"_

The music slows down yet again, to the same rhythm as at the beginning. 

_"When I first tried to get in the game_   
_I failed miserably_   
_But now, the game's been changed around_   
_... That's plain to seeee....."_

The music picks up yet again. 

_"Once when I thought back on_   
_The live I once lead_   
_I lay on my bed and cry_   
_Then I sat and said...!___

_'Maybe soon, I will be well known_   
_It's always been my dream_   
_So I'll sit back and relax to my songs_   
_And I would like some pickles and cream!'___

_I. Am. On the way up!_   
_Soon I'll be on the top!_   
_I. Am. On the way up!_   
_And I will not be able to stop!_   
_I'm on the way uuuuup!_   
_Yeah yeah yeeeeaaaah!"_

Then there was a musical break for 6 measures (^^ I do know some musical shit, I am a singer), where as he just danced around like a rabid monkey. 

_I am not a hamster!_   
_I am not a hamster!_   
_I am not a hamster!_   
_I'm not a fucking hamsteeeeeeeer!___

_So as the bugs and birds peck at my head_   
_I used to sit there wishing I were dead_   
_But now I just drag their asses in the shed_   
_And this is what I saaaaaiiiid....!___

_I. Am. On the way up!_   
_Soon I'll be on the top!_   
_I. Am. On the way up!_   
_And I will not be able to stop!_   
_I'm on the way uuuuup!"_

The music quieted down, but kept the same beat. Then he sings quietly. 

_"I. Am. On the way up..._   
_Soon I'll be on the top..._   
_I. Am. On the way up..._   
_And I will not be able to stoooooop..._   
_I'm on the way ::gets louder, almost screams:: uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup!!!"___

The music stops, and the rest is sung in a soft, caring manor. 

_"I am on. The way. Uuuuuuuuuuuuuup....."_

Piccolo bowed and sat down for a breather as he hit the stop button on the tape player. He looked around expectedly at the room full of raised eyebrows. Then started the light clapping which grew louder and louder. Piccolo's eyes lit up like a pervert reading their first lemon. (^^; I just kinda dissed myself.... I'm a major perv..... ^^) He stood up and started bowing again.   
"Wonderful!" Mr. Grace yelled. "We must get you to the recording studio at once to record that, but first we need to get you a band. And we're gonna need 10 more songs by Sunday."   
Piccolo smiled. "I can do that! I'm full of inspiration!" Piccolo turned and looked at the camera. "They love me! They really love me! I really will become...." he takes a breath. "A pop star!!"   
  


So? What you think of chapter 2? Rather creepy, eh? Anyway, I will gone next week (August 5-11), and I really hope I'm able to post Wild Horses by then. FanFiction.Net won't let me! It's prolly that damn Code Red Internet Worm.... You can upload chapters to stories you already have on there, but you can't upload new stories. Try it! I dare you! ::sigh:: That's bullshit.... ::whimper:: I hope to get it up very soon, I love it, the story is wonderful! At least I think it is.... Anyway, review please! I love feedback! I know it's scary, but please... ^^ Well, ja people! 

- Trixie/Juuhachigou   
  
  



	3. Chapter Three: A Day With A Friend

Piccolo - The Pop Star Days 3 - A Day With A Friend Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ. DUH!!!!   
Story Title: Piccolo: The Pop Star Days   
Chapter Title: A Day With A Friend   
Chapter Number: 3   
Genre: Humor   
Rating: PG-13   
Notes: Hey! Chapter 2! It's going to be rather short, I'm sorry. But this story takes place in one day so.... Anyway, the next chapter will be longer, I swear. It will have songs in it n shtuff. ^^ And just to let you know, all the songs in this story are written by either me, my friends, or me and my friends. THANK YOU GUYS!!!!!!! And now, it's time for name mentioning: a big thanks so far to: Sara (Frootie) and Izzy (MoonChild). They both are on FanFiction.Net under the names in parentheses. Okay! On with the story!! ^^   
"..." – speaking   
*...* - thinking   
  


"Hey Goku!!" Piccolo yelled through the phone to his friend.   
"Hey Piccolo!! What's up??" Goku yelled back with equal excitement. (They are both acting on the same level... scary isn't it?)   
"I'M GONNA BE A SINGER!!!!!!!!!!" Piccolo screeched into the receiver. Goku gasped on the other end.   
"Really?!?! THAT'S SO COOL!!!" Goku cried.   
"I KNOW!!" Piccolo screamed, then both started screaming like 2nd grade school girls and hopping around the room like bunnies.   
Then Piccolo stopped, stared at the wall with a blank look, then his face lit up. "Hey! I got an idea!" He heard the screaming and rumbling of Goku's house stop suddenly. "Why don't you come over and help me write some songs?!"   
Goku gasped. "You really want me to help you? OH MY GOD!! YOU ARE THE COOLEST PERSON IN THE WORLD!!!"   
"I KNOW!!"   
"Okay, I'll be right over bye!" ::click::   
Piccolo hung up the phone and squealed with happiness. Then he gasped and cried, "I need to clean!"   
He ran to the kitchen and grabbed his frilly pink apron from the rack, along with his light pink Bandana to keep his antennas out of his face. He put the apron and bandana on and ran into the hall room closet. He grabbed the vacuum and went to the living room. He plugged it in, and then vacuumed the room in literally 5 seconds. He stood back and looked, then sighed at the beauty. He put the vacuum back in the closet, then walked over to one of the windows. He ran his finger along the windowsill and gasped.   
Dust.   
Then he looked at the window and gasped again (yea... He gasps a lot...).   
Smudges.   
He ran back to the hall room closet muttering, "Oh my oh my oh my!" and threw open the door. He reached in a grabbed a bucket, soap, scrubbing tools, Windex?, and other cleaning things.   
He spent the next 10 minutes zipping from window to window, spraying with Windex? and wiping with a specially designed towel to not smudge things that he crocheted himself. Then he went around to all the surfaces in his house and dusted them all.   
When he was finally finished, he put all the stuff away, then went to his room to change. He came back out in a maroon smoking jacket and an old, antique pipe. He sat on the couch, and puffed a bit on nothing, being as he didn't light the pipe or even bother to fill it with tobacco. He sat on the left side of the couch with his right arm on the back of it, legs crossed in a manly manor (Hey! Alliteration! School.... ugh...).   
Finally, after waiting about a minute in that same position; still smoking on nothing; Goku arrives and dances through the door.   
"What took you so damn long??" Piccolo cried, looking angry but still sitting in his nonchalant fashion.   
Goku looked at the ground and twiddled his fingers. "Well..." he started nervously, his cheeks red with embarrassment. "I was dancing in the air all the way over here and uh... I wasn't really paying attention to where I was going and uhh... I uhh... kinda... ran into a tree... It knocked me out for about 20 minutes..."   
Piccolo looked at him and raised an eyebrow (does he eve have eyebrows? Aren't they just skin? Something to think about). He sighed. "That's okay, but we really have to get to work, it's already 10 am—" Piccolo stopped suddenly and looked down at his pipe. He scowled at it and chucked it across the room. "Stupid piece of shit doesn't even work... And this robe thing is hot!" He took that off and threw it into an unknown place. Then he stood up and turned to Goku. "Let's start!" he cried as he crouched down in girlie position. Goku did the same. "OK!!!" 

For the next 10 hours Piccolo and Goku worked on songs, they came up with a total of about 15 songs and were very proud of themselves. As a matter of fact, they were in the middle of celebrating when the unthinkable, yet inevitable happened.   
The ringing of the phone interrupted their dancing and screaming. Piccolo rushed over to it and picked it up.   
"Hello?" he answered politely, hoping it was his agent. But it wasn't. Not even close.   
"PICCOLO!!! TELL GOKU TO GET HIS SAIYAN ASS HOME THIS INSTANT!!!!! I KNOW HE'S THERE!!!" yelled Chichi, pissed off as always.   
Goku heard her voice loud and clear from the other side of the room. He screamed and jumped behind the couch. He peeked his head above it and said, "For Christ sakes tell her I'm not here!!"   
Piccolo looked at him nervously, beads of sweat running down his face. *What do I say? What do I say??* he thought. "Um... He's not here."   
"DON'T GIVE ME THAT BULLSHIT YOU GREEN PIECE OF FILTH!!!! I KNOW HE'S THERE!!!!"   
He turned to Goku and mouthed 'I don't know what to day!' Goku thought for a minute, then whispered, "Tell her that there was a world crisis that I had to overt. It started about 5 hours ago and we both went. Tell her I'm on my way home now and that you just got back." Piccolo shrugged.   
"Okay. Here's the story. Me and Goku went out to overt a world crisis about 5 hours ago. I got home about 30 seconds before you called. Goku is on his way home." There was a silence.   
"..... Oh....." was all he heard. Piccolo smiled, but it soon faded. "Wait a minute... This is one of Goku's hair-brained schemes to not get in trouble again, isn't it?? ISN'T IT????" Piccolo held the phone away from his ear and held it in Goku's direction. "GOKU!!!! GET YOUR BUSTED ASS OVER TO THIS PHONE AND TALK TO ME NOW!!!!!"   
Goku sighed in defeat from behind the couch and dragged himself over to the phone. Halfway over there, he heard "AND DON'T YOU DARE ACT ALL PATHETIC AND SLUMPY OVER THERE!!!!!!" from the phone. He instantly stood up straight and plastered on an obviously fake smile. He took the phone and said, "H-hi honey...."   
"Oh don't you 'hi honey' me!! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE HOME 2 HOURS AGO!!! YOU KNOW YOU HAVE AN 8 O'CLOCK CURFUE!!"   
"Yes... I'm sorry baby.... I'll be over soon.... Please don't kill me....." Goku pleaded.   
"Yeah you'd BETTER be begging for your life!!!" was what he heard before the phone hung up on the other end, leaving him listening to the dial tone in hopes that his salvation would come of it. He sighed and hung up the phone. ".... I gotta go....." he whimpered.   
"Yeah, I had gathered that much," Piccolo responded solemnly. "Tomorrow I'll call my agent and tell him about all the songs we came up with."   
"Good. Let me know what they tell you, okay?" Goku looked up with a smile, teary-eyed.   
"Sure thing buddy!" he cried as he threw his arms around Goku, then they both started bawling.   
  


Well, that's the chapter. VERY short I know... ::whimper:: The next chapter will hopefully be out soon! I hope so anyway. I don't usually write in class at school, the only time I do write in school is during 7th hour (last hour) because that's my keyboarding class! And since we're learning how to type and I already KNOW how to type, I get done with our little typing exercises before everyone else. ^^ So I type a lot everyday. Okay! Ja ne minna-chan! PLEASE REVIEW!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE REVIEWS!!!!!!! ::kisses all the review::   



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